We are our emotions. Who can change them has power on us for good, or bad, for wanting it or not. This includes us. It isn't possible to change our own emotions for long by pure will. We need to understand why those emotions arises from which need.
Identifying the needs in ourselves as well as in others is how you can move forward.
Yes, learn from others. One hasn't to do all mistakes themselves. Learn from those who did.
By focusing on what is needed, you are able to adapt and accept tradeoffs and others may respond to your need in a way your didn't anticipated.
Facing babbles in discussion is exhausting. You are making more than two sides of the communication: you are making your side, then you guess the other side, meaning that you make two or three proposals.
It's important to chat with them. No question. Just recognize this as something which could be exhausting. If it is the case, explain, and focus on what matters more for you.
When they are playing by themselves, you may have some time for yourself. If you move too much they may think of you and come or ask something. This could be seen as a trap: if you move then you are not quiet anymore. If you can't do what you want or like while being quiet, then move. Face the trap, they have to learn to see you without needing you.
Most of the time, there isn't any logic. They could want to eat and throw the food away at the same time. And cry for help to resolve those needs. You can only satisfy one. If it continues, it's not your fault, they don't know itself what is needed now. They may already have changed their mind by the way. And yet again.
If you don't have a deadline or a meeting, you are free and not in any rush. It doesn't mean the task can take forever, only that you choose what and until when.